JoeJoe Posted October 28, 2014 Share Posted October 28, 2014 If they are in a relationship that's on them. I'm single so I can sleep with whoever I want, whether they are taken or not taken. It's not my job to look after them. If you know you're in a relationship then it's not my duty to slap you on the hand and say "hey stop sucking my dick! aren't you dating someone?!". Answer: Single people sleep with whoever. It's the taken people who need to own up to their own actions. People always wanna point the blame. "Stop texting my wife!".... when it should be "I'm single, how about why is your wife texting me?" Exactly! If you feel the need to cheat then you don't need to be in a committed relationship. Be in an open relationship or just stay single and keep your fwb. You need to check ya man or ya girl. People in a relationship are the ones bound by a moral and emotional contract. Single people aren't. I will say this tho. If a single person is being pursued by someone in a relationship then it's not their fault if they feel like "well he/she is hot so why not?", but if a single person is pursuing someone who's in a relationship then that's when I think it gets a little dirty cause they seem desperate going after someone who's in a relationship. That's something I don't and never will do. I don't pursue, I get pursued I agree with Effy and Game ( ) It's on the cheating partner. Is it icky for the single person to do? Yes but it's not their responsibility. However, if you are hooking up regularly with a taken person and you're the side ho and you're expecting an eventual relationship out of that, that's a different thing Yup but what if you are hooking up with them regularly and you're not expecting an eventual relationship. You just wanna keep it how it is. I also don't care for people saying stuff like "If you respect yourself" blah blah blah. I don't see how you're disrespecting yourself. If anything it's the cheating person who's disrespecting themselves and the person they're in a relationship with. They should have self control but if they're gonna cheat they're gonna cheat whether it's with me or anybody else. As I said earlier if my ex was in a relationship and he wanted to fuck around with me IT WILL HAPPEN. We actually had a talk last night similar to this discussion. He asked me how would I feel if he had a new bf and brought him around me since we're still friends. He said he'd tell his bf we're friends and he's not gonna stop being my friend. I said I probably wouldn't mind but if he told me that me and him won't mess around ever again then I wouldn't like it cause what happens if they break up? He was like "Well if i'm with someone I don't cheat." and I was like that's fine and he asked would I cheat with him if I had a bf. Then he talked about both of us having new bfs and would it be cool if we all hung out as friends and I said yeah i'd be totally fine with that. I told him "you've had 1 or 2 bfs after me and you were my first and only bf ever so this is why you're getting these responses from me. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EphraimAdamz Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Why did this response turn me on? Anyway, I get what you're saying. But if we applied that logic to other situations would you still say that? For example selling a drink to an alcoholic? Or giving a druggie some drugs? Shouldn't the enabler hold some responsibility? But we aren't talking about drugs or substance abuse. Drug addictions are a scientific chemical where the human body goes through withdrawals and psychosis where the person cannot function/has no control over their need of the drug. If I was offering sex to a ex addict then that would be another story, but we're talking about a common sense decision no different than choosing to wear a red shirt for the day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EphraimAdamz Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Lets say the forum is throwing a sex party... JoeJoe, NeonGold, and everyone's getting their naughty on.... Game walks in.... however Game's in a relationship. So its the forums job to turn to Game and say, "Hey Game, shouldn't you be home with your boo"? If Game wants to play on the low it's nobodies business. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EphraimAdamz Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 You can have responsibility, too. This isn't one-sided here. We both need to have some self-control. The cheater isn't at all absolved, but the person helping them cheat shouldn't get off scot-free either. You know what's going on. You know that nothing good can come from this except a quick release for you, and someone will be hurt in the aftermath. You played a small role in that problem. You have a portion of the responsibility. That's direct. That's just shifting the goal post. Okay, you see something you think is good, by law it's tested, you see it has a certain mercury content in it but it was put on the shelf anyway even if it shouldn't be there. Why eat it anyway? You aren't starving. Say it with me, "no" and go. Of course, but it takes two here. I'm not here for just holding one accountable when both have a problem. This really happened to me, though she cheated with a female friend of mine, so from that experience I say I'd be upset with both. Obviously I'm much more angry and hurt by my girlfriend for lying and deceiving me into thinking she cared about me. However, that doesn't let my friend (or the man) off the hook since she(he) knew I was in a relationship with her. She(he) could have said "no" to keep from hurting me even if she(he) didn't tell me about my girl trying to cheat on me or try to convince her not to do it. She (he) could have just said "no". My solution was to cut them both off. To answer the next question, yes, I'd feel the same way even if it wasn't a friend who my ex cheated with. If you know they're in a relationship, why go for it anyway and hurt the partner (me) even in minor way? Was getting off really that important in that moment that you couldn't just go to someone else who at least seemed to be single instead of someone you know is in a relationship? You know you're contributing to someone getting hurt even if it isn't entirely your fault. Why do it? I don't get it at all. But see that adds a whole new dynamic. If you two are friends then yes I would hold them a little more accountable. At the end of the day though the cigarette box clearly says causes cancer. You can't be mad for getting sick after toking a few packs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EphraimAdamz Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 I will say this tho. If a single person is being pursued by someone in a relationship then it's not their fault if they feel like "well he/she is hot so why not?", but if a single person is pursuing someone who's in a relationship then that's when I think it gets a little dirty cause they seem desperate going after someone who's in a relationship. That's something I don't and never will do. I don't pursue, I get pursued 10 points for JoeJoe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reyna ♔ Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 But see that adds a whole new dynamic. If you two are friends then yes I would hold them a little more accountable. At the end of the day though the cigarette box clearly says causes cancer. You can't be mad for getting sick after toking a few packs. I'm really not in the mood to repeat myself, but if you know someone is doing wrong, you shouldn't be intentionally be adding to it. Friends or otherwise. You're aiding them and share a small portion of the responsibility. No-one is that hard up for sex that they can't say no. Your analogy actually helps my point, so thanks for that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeJoe Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 You can have responsibility, too. This isn't one-sided here. We both need to have some self-control. The cheater isn't at all absolved, but the person helping them cheat shouldn't get off scot-free either. You know what's going on. You know that nothing good can come from this except a quick release for you, and someone will be hurt in the aftermath. You played a small role in that problem. You have a portion of the responsibility. That's direct. That's just shifting the goal post. Okay, you see something you think is good, by law it's tested, you see it has a certain mercury content in it but it was put on the shelf anyway even if it shouldn't be there. Why eat it anyway? You aren't starving. Say it with me, "no" and go. Of course, but it takes two here. I'm not here for just holding one accountable when both have a problem. This really happened to me, though she cheated with a female friend of mine, so from that experience I say I'd be upset with both. Obviously I'm much more angry and hurt by my girlfriend for lying and deceiving me into thinking she cared about me. However, that doesn't let my friend (or the man) off the hook since she(he) knew I was in a relationship with her. She(he) could have said "no" to keep from hurting me even if she(he) didn't tell me about my girl trying to cheat on me or try to convince her not to do it. She (he) could have just said "no". My solution was to cut them both off. To answer the next question, yes, I'd feel the same way even if it wasn't a friend who my ex cheated with. If you know they're in a relationship, why go for it anyway and hurt the partner (me) even in minor way? Was getting off really that important in that moment that you couldn't just go to someone else who at least seemed to be single instead of someone you know is in a relationship? You know you're contributing to someone getting hurt even if it isn't entirely your fault. Why do it? I don't get it at all. and that's when there would've been a fight between me and her or me and both of them. Yes it will get physical baby That totally different. If it's a friend doing it to you that's more dirty than it being a stranger and they're gonna pay one way or another Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bailey Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Lets say the forum is throwing a sex party... JoeJoe, NeonGold, and everyone's getting their naughty on.... Game walks in.... however Game's in a relationship. So its the forums job to turn to Game and say, "Hey Game, shouldn't you be home with your boo"? If Game wants to play on the low it's nobodies business. that scenario makes zero sense we all know JoeJoe be late and aint no Latinos in the mix so miss me wit this bruh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reyna ♔ Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 and that's when there would've been a fight between me and her or me and both of them. Yes it will get physical baby That totally different. If it's a friend doing it to you that's more dirty than it being a stranger and they're gonna pay one way or another It obviously makes it worse, but it would still hurt period for even a stranger to sleep with my partner especially if they know she/he is in a relationship with me. A stranger doesn't make the pain any better for me since they still knew that my partner was in a relationship. If they knew nothing of me then that's one thing, but in this case you know that I'm there even if you don't know me for yourself. Oh yeah, they paid big time for it. I don't play that type of mess. I'm not talking about a fight or even screaming and yelling. I'm fucking your shit up one good time if you cross me that way and watching from a distance like "I told you so". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedSimba Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 To answer the topic question, no. Enabling a cheater just wouldn't be as satisfying as doing it within a committed relationship (same goes for one-night stands). I understand everyone is different, but as for me ~ drama-free is the way to be. I agree with Reyna. As for the cheeseburger analogy, I'd just say "No, I sneezed on it." 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bailey Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 so many dissertations in here, anyway, I dont think guys really consider the consequences of their actions, we act and think after in some cases not all, as many here are obviously not fucking anything not "perfect" ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rock & Roll Hall of Game Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Lets say the forum is throwing a sex party... JoeJoe, NeonGold, and everyone's getting their naughty on.... Game walks in.... however Game's in a relationship. So its the forums job to turn to Game and say, "Hey Game, shouldn't you be home with your boo"? If Game wants to play on the low it's nobodies business. "Game was there picking up Bu* "Lets go home.," says Game Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bu. Posted October 29, 2014 Author Share Posted October 29, 2014 "Game was there picking up Bu* "Lets go home.," says Game Bu says, "No thanks, bae. I'm going home with Reyna/Escapade" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rock & Roll Hall of Game Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Bu says, "No thanks, bae. I'm going home with Reyna/Escapade" To do their nails and makeup Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bu. Posted October 29, 2014 Author Share Posted October 29, 2014 To do their nails and makeup No. To kii about how thirsty/slutty/easy all you gays on here are x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bailey Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 No. To kii about how thirsty/slutty/easy all you gays on here are x Don't do it BU......it would be nothing for me to make an anonymous call and have the people come get you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bailey Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 can I say Im just glad Im not a bottom....aint nobody fucking me and cumming inside me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bu. Posted October 29, 2014 Author Share Posted October 29, 2014 Don't do it BU......it would be nothing for me to make an anonymous call and have the people come get you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bailey Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeJoe Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 It obviously makes it worse, but it would still hurt period for even a stranger to sleep with my partner especially if they know she/he is in a relationship with me. A stranger doesn't make the pain any better for me since they still knew that my partner was in a relationship. If they knew nothing of me then that's one thing, but in this case you know that I'm there even if you don't know me for yourself. Oh yeah, they paid big time for it. I don't play that type of mess. I'm not talking about a fight or even screaming and yelling. I'm fucking your shit up one good time if you cross me that way and watching from a distance like "I told you so". well either way it would be the cheater's fault for engaging with someone else period. They were gonna cheat whether it was your friend or not. It's just unfortunate it happened to be your friend. As for me I would like it better if it was a stranger rather than my friend.The stranger doesn't have any control over the cheater but like I said yeah I find it wrong if they know you're in a relationship but if it's a good friend of mine or my ex then yeah we gon do it if they want Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reyna ♔ Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 well either way it would be the cheater's fault for engaging with someone else period. They were gonna cheat whether it was your friend or not. It's just unfortunate it happened to be your friend. As for me I would like it better if it was a stranger rather than my friend.The stranger doesn't have any control over the cheater but like I said yeah I find it wrong if they know you're in a relationship but if it's a good friend of mine or my ex then yeah we gon do it if they want It's mostly their fault, yes, but regardless, if you know someone's in a relationship then you're in the wrong, too, for messing with them anyway. It doesn't matter who they mess with. If they're up front about their relationship status and you sleep with them, then you share in their wrongdoing and blame. Not as heavily, but you do. Simple as that. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janet.1814 Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 I'm so glad that I read this....I'm currently sleeping with my ex, who has a bf. After reading this thread, I'm deciding to stop. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aquaria Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 I'm so glad that I read this....I'm currently sleeping with my ex, who has a bf. After reading this thread, I'm deciding to stop. Reyna has done it again 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reyna ♔ Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 I'm so glad that I read this....I'm currently sleeping with my ex, who has a bf. After reading this thread, I'm deciding to stop. Reyna has done it again Man, I'm good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rock & Roll Hall of Game Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 Man, I'm good. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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