Selz

Like Bruvski I remember the name but not the character so much - I liked him though so I'm really sorry to hear this

This has stayed in the back of my mind - maybe we should try and schedule a date? I don't about y'all's Christmas but mine was a pile of shit, wasn't allowed to leave London and had to spend it alone in my flat. And Boris Johnson about to make another national address tonight to make things a bit worse - could do with something to look forward to! I know we're on different timezones etc. but I'm sure we can make it work if we're keen?

Yeah that was my thought too

Since most of us are probably familiar with Zoom now, how about a Jan fam Zoom catch up? I think a lot of us know each other from Facebook and Insta so can't imagine it'd be too awkward What do you all think?

I'm glad. You need to take time out for yourself. It seems like Chadwick Boseman hit a lot of you guys hard. I can't lie, I didn't know much about him - I DID see Get On Up, which was brilliant, but not Black Panther yet because it's a comic book movie and I was never a fan of those. I'm gonna take time to check it out though, it seems like he touched a lot of people. And he was my age, and he had colon cancer, and my eldest brother had his diseased colon removed a few years ago, and it all just made me stop short. With Jacob Blake, something in me deflated. It opened my eyes again to a snippet of what it's like to be a Black person in America, like we're doing all this fighting and then this happens and it feels like we're just not being taken seriously. It's not okay. It makes me want to scream at the world. A lot makes me want to do that lately. We have to keep going.

How was your stint on Drag Race?

I saw Parasite at the cinema - what did you think of it? (obviously a lot because you gave it an A )

SMG was my girl crush or possibly Buffy was? I've also finished watching RuPaul's Drag Race season 12 (terrible finale - why didn't he wait to film it properly? Always chasing the skrilla All Stars 5 was good

I'm rewatching Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Prime. I haven't seen it for over 10 years - it still makes me cry. The storylines in the earlier series were brilliant.

I loved Chewing Gum. So funny. I haven't watched I May Destroy You yet.

And that’s why I can’t even wrap my head around how exhausted you all must feel. To have that mental checklist running through at every second. I’ve heard many black people say they know how this movie ends, but I will still pray to the God who is more powerful than any of these oppressive systems, that THIS time might be different.

You know what - it helps too to hear you say that. As much as I want to (and am) stand up for people of colour right now, it is a bit of a minefield because like many white people I don't want to offend. But it helps to have read things like being told that it's better to say something and get it wrong than to not say anything at all. It's really encouraging to me that things are actually happening, like Chauvin's charge being increased and the other three officers arrested and charged, but at the same time I'm aware that white people need to be watched at this point, that we don't rest on our laurels because this one thing happened. After all, the officers who beat Rodney King were all arrested, and they got off because the jury was white. White people don't get to stop pulling up just because some officers in the latest case were arrested. What I think I do need to do is find the line between saying stuff all the time and listening to others. My sister in law messaged me on Insta a couple days ago and told me to 'move on'. When I asked 'Why?' she said because I have been signed off with anxiety and depression she worries that this issue can have an impact on mental health. While I understand that, I also understand that moving on is not an option. It's only my privilege that would allow me to do that. I cannot. I could spend hours reading social media posts but have come to realise that a lot of them are making the same point, and it's a point that I DO get. I do want to keep on top of updates though. I hope you all don't mind me saying this here, I'm just pouring out some of what's been going through my head the last few days.

Thanks Bailey. My eyes are being opened to the people I know too, not saying anything... you know how you can see who views your stories on IG and FB, well it’s always the same people on mine and 98% of them are still silent. I’m trying not to judge because they may have reasons - but it’s illuminating. There’s loads of big brand companies speaking out, but do their ‘insides’ match their ‘outsides’ or are they just doing it to be ‘seen’? But I also hear you that maybe some are just listening for now - the problem is that while they’re listening POC are dying. Jessie J’s stories are very telling right now, she is hollering at celebs and influencers who are showing that their aesthetic is more important to them than this issue. We need more. In the meantime I’m trying to do whatever I can. I’m standing with you.

I love ya’ll too, I’ve been talking to you in some form or another since I think 2005 when I first started living on my own. I don’t post here much anymore but I do see many of your stories and posts on FB, Insta and Twitter. Even though you don’t look at mine

I have no power like that Angie probably can.

It’s nuts that we didn’t know - but then how would the fam know to contact us... Paul was such a great guy when I met him with Bu, he was funny and that squirrel whispering thing was crazy lol. There’s been a lot of people disappeared off this forum. I think about Henry quite often.

So I’m on Twitter arguing against Trump calling the Minneapolis rioters ‘thugs’ - I’m getting a lot of likes but also some people keep posting this - Obama calls Baltimore rioters ‘criminals and thugs’ . Currently I have no answer for this because I didn’t know about it prior - but I want to be educated. Did he actually say that and what do you think about it? I’ve known most of you for years, and you me - so I trust you and your opinions. I’m trying to use my privilege to speak up for people of colour but I still need educating.

I’m only 42 cos I’ve been alive that long... I’m still naive as hell, single as hell and immature as hell Though it freaks me out to think I’m old enough to have a 26 YO... I work and go to church with those youngers lol

I liked Alyssa Edwards, Alexis Matteo, Ginger Minj, Ivy Winters - I love Jinkx Monsoon in the season I’m currently watching. What about yours? (faves but no winners lol) Bu - No spoilers! Lol. Who do you like? Baga and The Vivienne are my favs out of who’s left. Divina’s ok but her lack of eyebrows frightens me lol. Cheryl Hole is biting Alyssa Edwards’ style too hard.

I’m trying to go in blind but I did get spoiled a couple of times by the internet and also in one season one of the other queens spoils a previous season winner because she was dating her! I’m not watching them in order as some seasons are way better than others. Season 1 is apparently not great, I started on season 3, 7, now 5 and then I’m gonna watch 4.

Do you watch it? I’m a fairly new recruit but I’m obsessed! It’s taking forever to get through as the seasons are so damn LONG but I’m loving them. Seen seasons 3 and 7, now on season 5. Ivyyyyyyy Win-terrrrrrrrrs! FYI - if you can watch BBC iPlayer the UK version is hilarious.

I love London Boy on Lover! My friends did a karaoke cover of Style and I am now obsessed with the song and more into TayTay, wasn't really interested in her before.

Hey! How you doing?

or have you gone completely digital? I’m having to move house again and just had a massive CD purge to cut down on stuff to pack. I still have so many that just hold memories though, like my Janet ones that I bought the day they were released and so on.