janetDAYZ Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 Say, you've been involved with someone for minute and things aren't going so well. So you both come to a mutual agreement to "take a break". QUESTION: Now during this "break" are you permitted to spend time with another or enjoy the company of another OR is that completely out of bounds? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LyricalLesson Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 This is definitely a controversial subject, because you're right, people have mad differing opinions regarding it. Here's how I feel about it. I'm a real old-fashioned dude, I guess. If I was ever in this situation, I would say the answer is a resounding "NO!" If you're on a "break" you're still "involved." ...it's like this: if you're at work, and you take a break, it's limited. After that break, whether it be a short one, or a long one, you know you're going back to work. You don't go to take on a new profession on your break, you just chill and gear up to get back to your job after your break has ended. Now, having said that, if us two amicably decide that "seeing" or "canoodling" with other people is fair game, then by all means, GET IT IN! Like I said though, I'm old fashioned, so I wouldn't be the one messing around. If I felt that my relationship was real enough to salvage, I would stay committed 100% through the "break." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vaquero Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 when my ex and I had to take a little "timeout" we didnt see anyone. our break consisted of us thinking about where our relationship was heading and things like that. I guess it just depends on the couple themselves. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janetDAYZ Posted November 13, 2010 Author Share Posted November 13, 2010 This is definitely a controversial subject, because you're right, people have mad differing opinions regarding it. Here's how I feel about it. I'm a real old-fashioned dude, I guess. If I was ever in this situation, I would say the answer is a resounding "NO!" If you're on a "break" you're still "involved." ...it's like this: if you're at work, and you take a break, it's limited. After that break, whether it be a short one, or a long one, you know you're going back to work. You don't go to take on a new profession on your break, you just chill and gear up to get back to your job after your break has ended. Now, having said that, if us two amicably decide that "seeing" or "canoodling" with other people is fair game, then by all means, GET IT IN! Like I said though, I'm old fashioned, so I wouldn't be the one messing around. If I felt that my relationship was real enough to salvage, I would stay committed 100% through the "break." And see..Im old fashioned to a VERY small degree tho. The way I view it is that "the break" is a defining point whether you wanna rekindle and proceed or let it go. The break is for you "to find yourself" or what have you and to me that entails the whole idea of you tryna figure out what it is that you truly desire. Therefore I feel during that period,whatever comes..whether it be a date or having the company of another should be permitted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janetDAYZ Posted November 13, 2010 Author Share Posted November 13, 2010 when my ex and I had to take a little "timeout" we didnt see anyone. our break consisted of us thinking about where our relationship was heading and things like that. I guess it just depends on the couple themselves. I assume it does varie form couple to couple because every relationship has different problems. So during you alls "timeout" ..what did you find..what were your discoveries on the solution? What was the conclusion? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hotboy06 Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 Discuss the terms of "taking a break"..It can mean different things for different people. If both of you need some time to yourself, then that's fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vaquero Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 I assume it does varie form couple to couple because every relationship has different problems. So during you alls "timeout" ..what did you find..what were your discoveries on the solution? What was the conclusion? with us, we were dealing with a lot of the same issues that we could not control. he kept things to himself and I expected to just naturally know what was going on with me. so when something went on, he wouldnt talk to me about it but to his friends. And when something went on with me, I expected him to say WHATS WRONG? We talked things over and we had to change some of those habits. Unfortunately our conclusion was the conclusion of our relationship. We had been together for 4 years and he went back to shutting me out on things. It was a hard decision for me to leave him, but it had to be done Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hotboy06 Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 with us, we were dealing with a lot of the same issues that we could not control. he kept things to himself and I expected to just naturally know what was going on with me. so when something went on, he wouldnt talk to me about it but to his friends. And when something went on with me, I expected him to say WHATS WRONG? We talked things over and we had to change some of those habits. Unfortunately our conclusion was the conclusion of our relationship. We had been together for 4 years and he went back to shutting me out on things. It was a hard decision for me to leave him, but it had to be done Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vaquero Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 I knew deep down that he was going to back to that. But when friends, who he had known for a month or so, were getting more priority over me, I knew where I stood with him Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janetDAYZ Posted November 13, 2010 Author Share Posted November 13, 2010 with us, we were dealing with a lot of the same issues that we could not control. he kept things to himself and I expected to just naturally know what was going on with me. so when something went on, he wouldnt talk to me about it but to his friends. And when something went on with me, I expected him to say WHATS WRONG? We talked things over and we had to change some of those habits. Unfortunately our conclusion was the conclusion of our relationship. We had been together for 4 years and he went back to shutting me out on things. It was a hard decision for me to leave him, but it had to be done Yeah.. it was inevitable Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hotboy06 Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 I knew deep down that he was going to back to that. But when friends, who he had known for a month or so, were getting more priority over me, I knew where I stood with him I know exactly what you mean. Communication is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo important in a relationship. And when you constantly are trying to figure out what's going on with your partner who doesn't wanna talk, then that pretty much is the end of your relationship. My name ain't Professor X and I don't read minds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vaquero Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 Yeah.. it was inevitable it was and I guess I knew it when he started going down that path again. I didnt have it in me to argue again with that. I know exactly what you mean. Communication is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo important in a relationship. And when you constantly are trying to figure out what's going on with your partner who doesn't wanna talk, then that pretty much is the end of your relationship. My name ain't Professor X and I don't read minds. Same here communication is important. He always wanted to know what was going on with me, but he never wanted to talk to me about what he was going through. after being broken up for almost 2 years, we started to talk again as friends. Well hadnt heard from him in months. He sent me a text of a forward and I didnt recognize the number. texted back who it was and he text back YOUR FRIEND JASON. He had gotten a new number and I was the last to know about it. You would think as a friend now I would get priority like others.......nope. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henrietta. Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 It completely out of bounds. You're still in a relationship and if you decided to enjoy someone else's company, I'll make that break permanent Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janetDAYZ Posted November 13, 2010 Author Share Posted November 13, 2010 It completely out of bounds. You're still in a relationship and if you decided to enjoy someone else's company, I'll make that break permanent Well its not like you would know I was enjoying someone elses company Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EphraimAdamz Posted November 13, 2010 Share Posted November 13, 2010 According to some of yall me and Janet are on a break Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
downeaznboi Posted November 14, 2010 Share Posted November 14, 2010 if you're on a break then you should be able to see whoever you want. there might be consequences after the brak is over though Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shawn1814 Posted November 14, 2010 Share Posted November 14, 2010 If they sleep with someone else during that "break" they don't really care about you. They just got a reason to fuck someone else.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janetDAYZ Posted November 14, 2010 Author Share Posted November 14, 2010 If they sleep with someone else during that "break" they don't really care about you. They just got a reason to fuck someone else.. You have to always go there dont you? No one said anything about actually sleeping with someone...I asked is dating out of bounds? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shawn1814 Posted November 14, 2010 Share Posted November 14, 2010 You have to always go there dont you? No one said anything about actually sleeping with someone...I asked is dating out of bounds? Dating/fucking is all the same.. You are supposed to take a break to figure out if you want to stay. Fucking or dating someone else during that time is just a free pass to cheat.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janetDAYZ Posted November 14, 2010 Author Share Posted November 14, 2010 Dating/fucking is all the same.. You are supposed to take a break to figure out if you want to stay. Fucking or dating someone else during that time is just a free pass to cheat.. You are always so hung up on this "cheating" thing. Some would say that when you are on break..its NOT cheating.Being on break could entail so many different things. Sometimes ppl do need to date others to see if what they have is truly where they wanna be. Whats the point of "taking a break" if you're not filling the holes that may be in the current relationship you are in. To me a break is to see if plan B (seeing what other fish are in the sea) is a better option than being with the one you've been with.Im not saying its REQUIRED but if it does happen..then so be it. Btw dating and sexing is NOT the same. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Baby Posted November 14, 2010 Share Posted November 14, 2010 What is this business of taking a break? Either you are together or your not. If you 'take a break' from me at 2pm, I will be in the next person's bed by 4. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Baby Posted November 14, 2010 Share Posted November 14, 2010 I know exactly what you mean. Communication is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo important in a relationship. And when you constantly are trying to figure out what's going on with your partner who doesn't wanna talk, then that pretty much is the end of your relationship. My name ain't Professor X and I don't read minds. yasssssssssssssssss...hunnies...yassssssssssssssssss Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janetDAYZ Posted November 14, 2010 Author Share Posted November 14, 2010 What is this business of taking a break? Either you are together or your not. If you 'take a break' from me at 2pm, I will be in the next person's bed by 4. Nuk BE SSERIOUS for a change Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Baby Posted November 14, 2010 Share Posted November 14, 2010 Nuk BE SSERIOUS for a change I am serious...If we are 'taking a break' then we are not together and I am going to have sex with whomever I was lusting over that I couldn't fuck because I was being faithful. There are 'no breaks'. Either we are together or we aren't Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
janetDAYZ Posted November 14, 2010 Author Share Posted November 14, 2010 I am serious...If we are 'taking a break' then we are not together and I am going to have sex with whomever I was lusting over that I couldn't fuck because I was being faithful. There are 'no breaks'. Either we are together or we aren't You dont think sometimes couples need time to "clear the air" and sort things out in solitude? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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