Angela Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 You sound like one of those kind of ppl who are GREAT at embellishing shit on your resume to make your work history appear to be more impressive than what it actually is. Nah, not even I read a lot of resumes to know how one should look like I just think that he's trying to make a strong case and he's saying what I basically said in the subsequent paragraphs. Since it is the opening, it needs to engage the reader, and have a strong thesis. The opening is always harder than the rest of the information behind it, because you need to say your premise in a few sentences. While it may be over the top, it would have caught the eye of the reader, which is the point Hell, I didn't even think it was that fancy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Idrag4mj Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Yes it is? That's the point You know what mean Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henrietta. Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 okay am i the only one scratching my head about "voice the size of texas" not american but isn't texas a really huge place ? Yeah it's big, but the biggest state is Alaska. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Idrag4mj Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Then how can janet have a voice as big as texas?? wouldn't we use the texas reference when discussing pre crack whitney ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angela Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Yeah it's big, but the biggest state is Alaska. Yup. I think the "____________ as big as Texas" simile is just a more known one, which is why people say it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Wonder Posted October 24, 2011 Author Share Posted October 24, 2011 Plus "Alaska" isn't a factor in the equation. Most Americas probably can't even locate Alaska on a map. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Escapade Posted October 24, 2011 Share Posted October 24, 2011 Plus "Alaska" isn't a factor in the equation. Most Americas probably can't even locate Alaska on a map. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Wonder Posted October 24, 2011 Author Share Posted October 24, 2011 Then how can janet have a voice as big as texas?? wouldn't we use the texas reference when discussing pre crack whitney ? It's a figurative voice. The goal is to show the contrast between Janet's small stature and a voice big enough to capture the attention of millions of people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laveaux Posted October 24, 2011 Share Posted October 24, 2011 Im loving this. I feel like going out and buying 1814 copies of Rhythm Nation after reading what you have so far. No seriously shit like this makes me proud to be a Janet fan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Wonder Posted October 24, 2011 Author Share Posted October 24, 2011 I'm tempted to HAND DELIVER the submission with a copy of RN1814. The Library of Congress is only 8 train stops away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Idrag4mj Posted October 24, 2011 Share Posted October 24, 2011 I'm tempted to HAND DELIVER the submission with a copy of RN1814. The Library of Congress is only 8 train stops away. that would be a great idea Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Wonder Posted October 24, 2011 Author Share Posted October 24, 2011 But they prefer email submissions because of anthrax and shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reyna ♔ Posted October 24, 2011 Share Posted October 24, 2011 But they prefer email submissions because of anthrax and shit. That is still an issue? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Wonder Posted October 24, 2011 Author Share Posted October 24, 2011 That is still an issue? Yes. I looked at that part, and was like "Oh, HON. " This ain't 2001. =\ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Wonder Posted October 24, 2011 Author Share Posted October 24, 2011 But in any event, can we have the final draft by tomorrow evening so I can send it off Wednesday morning? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reyna ♔ Posted October 24, 2011 Share Posted October 24, 2011 Yes. I looked at that part, and was like "Oh, HON. " This ain't 2001. =\ Exactly But in any event, can we have the final draft by tomorrow evening so I can send it off Wednesday morning? I'd say it was ready already. What do you feel is still missing from it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kim Posted October 24, 2011 Share Posted October 24, 2011 I'm tempted to HAND DELIVER the submission with a copy of RN1814. The Library of Congress is only 8 train stops away. I think giving them a copy of the album is an excellent idea. It'll get their attention. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Wonder Posted October 25, 2011 Author Share Posted October 25, 2011 Exactly I'd say it was ready already. What do you feel is still missing from it? I don't think there's much missing, I just want it to be perfect. I can't tell you how many times I've read the last draft and made changes. I think giving them a copy of the album is an excellent idea. It'll get their attention. I really could do that. But I have to work tomorrow. The Library of Congress is like 15mins on the train. I could stop by before class. But the obstacle would be finding a copy of RN1814 in this area. But I was thinking I could put a link in the submission to where they can listen to the whole album. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bu. Posted October 25, 2011 Share Posted October 25, 2011 Give them your copy and you buy a new one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reyna ♔ Posted October 25, 2011 Share Posted October 25, 2011 Give them your copy and you buy a new one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bu. Posted October 25, 2011 Share Posted October 25, 2011 I doubt they will click a link IMO...if they're still worried about anthrax then they'll be equally concerned about clicking a link to a potential virus too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reyna ♔ Posted October 25, 2011 Share Posted October 25, 2011 I doubt they will click a link IMO...if they're still worried about anthrax then they'll be equally concerned about clicking a link to a potential virus too. That's true. I still say he should buy one. I wouldn't give our politicians a blank cd much less one of my favorites(greatest). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bu. Posted October 25, 2011 Share Posted October 25, 2011 That's true. I still say he should buy one. I wouldn't give our politicians a blank cd much less one of my favorites(greatest). Well he could get next day delivery from Amazon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reyna ♔ Posted October 25, 2011 Share Posted October 25, 2011 Well he could get next day delivery from Amazon That works Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Wonder Posted October 25, 2011 Author Share Posted October 25, 2011 Amazon would take too long cuz I'm submitting this tomorrow morning. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.