Bailey Posted November 29, 2010 Share Posted November 29, 2010 ...its tough, Paul was right, if I let the ex back in its a scab that keeps getting unhealed. I am hurting tonight, im sad, lonely, upset, this shit is not easy. I find myself googling how to get over an ex, everyone says stay busy, well I only have so much to do, and lately I have been lazy, I started working out over 2 months ago, I actually see results now, I cant imagine in 6 months what i would look like. So tonight I knew I have papers to write, exams to prepare for, and I actually decided to just get drunk. One thing I mentioned before is true, I NEVER contact my ex, I dont know if its just my father's pride in me or what, but I can't be that guy. I read its just going to take time, but I broke up with him in the middle of June, and Dec 12, would have been our 1 year, instead it is the day I finish school and graduate. I never finished my degree, I stopped shy of two classes, I had to fight with petitions and won, I know this thread is crazy but im ranting, I walk cap and gown Dec 12, I sure hope thats enough for me to forget. I just hate this, he always said Im too emotional and that he could tell I still care too much. I hate him for being so cold and distant. Hell I miss my therapist right now, yea I said it, so what, he helps me to see things in a better light, I was told my thinking needs to be bust open altogether. I just dont want to feel or think about this asshole anymore, I know deep down inside, it was not for me, and it really is his lose, if you folks saw the things he is willing to fuck around with compared to me you would want to slap him. I just wanted someone that was apart of my life, that cared about me that truly loved me, but I know now that was not love. I create profiles on websites he is on, its fucking pathetic, so now I fight myself to stay off those places, somedays are better than others, today was not one of them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vaquero Posted November 29, 2010 Share Posted November 29, 2010 Its what Im dealing with now...moving on it sucks because I know my ex had no problem moving on but I feel stuck in the same place.... like you, some days are hard, some days are easier Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aquaria Posted November 29, 2010 Share Posted November 29, 2010 congratulations on finishing up school, just focus on positive things Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bailey Posted November 29, 2010 Author Share Posted November 29, 2010 Its what Im dealing with now...moving on it sucks because I know my ex had no problem moving on but I feel stuck in the same place.... like you, some days are hard, some days are easier im in a psychology class, its developmental psy, which means we went thru psychology from birth to adulthood, and we are talking about adult relationships now, and there is a theory by a guy called the 4 hoursemen of the apocalypse it refers to 4 signs of a failed relationship, so I posted on mine, because we had all 4 contempt, Brian would say I was annoying him when I tried to talk to him about our problems, criticism, he would say the meanest things, defensiveness, when I would try to call him out on his shit he would say I always feel like your arguing with me, and the worst of the four to me, stonewalling, its when I would talk and he would act as if I was not even in the room. This class taught me a few things about myself, and my ex, I read that stonewalling is actually a means of communicating that you dont know is, when doctors would hook up monitors to someone stonewalling they found the person you thought was not caring or just being cold was actually very effected by what was going on, I rememeber the night I packed my bags and told him I was leaving, he got really calm sat on the couch and said nothing as I ranted, a few weeks later he saw me because we were still going, and saw that bag, and he goes, "I hate that bag it reminds me of that horrible night" and I thought to myself...wait? I remember that night you didnt flinch... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bailey Posted November 29, 2010 Author Share Posted November 29, 2010 Its what Im dealing with now...moving on it sucks because I know my ex had no problem moving on but I feel stuck in the same place.... like you, some days are hard, some days are easier u said 3 months tho....i want to know or see me in 3 months no contact, my ex always hits me up just to see if he still has that power Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vaquero Posted November 29, 2010 Share Posted November 29, 2010 u said 3 months tho....i want to know or see me in 3 months no contact, my ex always hits me up just to see if he still has that power yeah, 3 months ago was the last time I talked to him and hope its the last...but before that it was maybe 2 and before that it was weekly. I think my ex, the times he would call me, wanted me to still be part of his life, but he had no problems about telling me about his hook ups and things like that. he called me his "bud" and called me buddy once. I thought, really after all this, I'm your bud....but after we would go months without talking he would act like it was no big deal. But I bitched him out so I probably wont hear from him again. If I do It might be during Christmas, but I doubt it since he didnt contact me for my bday Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
s.omner Posted November 29, 2010 Share Posted November 29, 2010 Relationships are hard. I got out of one of 3 1/2 years and he totally screwed me over. This was back in January. I have been over him a long time before we broke up. He constantly contacts me and wants to get back together - sends me nude photos, etc. You just have to be strong. You don't have to jump into another relationship, but go on dates - meet new people. Like everyone always says, "Plenty of fish in the sea." If you give yourself that opportunity to "let go," you would be able to do it. Till this day, guys always tell me that I am "cold-hearted." I don't fall in love quickly and men that I sleep with is just that, men I sleep with. They think that I should be in love in order to have sex. I'm like sex is sex, love is love. I'm not looking for a relationship, but when they come to visit, I treat them like Kings. I can't say the same when we're just texting, talking on the phone, etc. If you would like to read self-help articles, I highly recommend the site below - I suggest this site to all my friends getting over breakups and heartbreaks. And to this day, it has helped them a great deal. Hopefully, the articles can benefit you as well. Be strong. Be happy. Be confident. http://www.2knowmyself.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henrietta. Posted November 29, 2010 Share Posted November 29, 2010 You're slowly starting to flood the forum Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bailey Posted November 29, 2010 Author Share Posted November 29, 2010 You're slowly starting to flood the forum stop it, this is not fun for me I like you better when you have something to say meaningful, and yes this topic is tired to you but for me its what im going thru Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rock & Roll Hall of Game Posted November 29, 2010 Share Posted November 29, 2010 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xtraordinary Xternal Posted November 29, 2010 Share Posted November 29, 2010 stop it, this is not fun for me I like you better when you have something to say meaningful, and yes this topic is tired to you but for me its what im going thru what did you expect hes immature? Anyway snap out of it nigga... I had a friend like you and we all left his ass feeling sorry for himself. At the end of the day you gotta pull yourself out of this rut... focus on the people who love and care for you... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henrietta. Posted November 29, 2010 Share Posted November 29, 2010 I love how the beast instantly comments about me instead of the topic...I tell you, letting someone you hate have that much control over you must be a bitch stop it, this is not fun for me I like you better when you have something to say meaningful, and yes this topic is tired to you but for me its what im going thru I didn't say it was fun. I understand the breakup and shit, but we told you on the JJF.net forum to let it go...and now you're making thread after thread about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SianGracious Posted November 30, 2010 Share Posted November 30, 2010 You're slowly starting to flood the forum :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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