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Confessions 2.0


Reyna ♔

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hmm to me it doesnt sound like u were born in the wrong body....it just sounds like thats who you are lol.........i dont see anything wrong with that, or finding someone to accept you just the way you are :)

:lol: Welll that sounds reasonable. The journey continues lol

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Everything is going way better than expected. They're just going to have him do physical therapy to see if there's any lost in his mobility, but I'm more than positive that there isn't any lost.

That's wonderful ^_^ Full recovery and best wishes for the both of you :)

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My parents pulled me out of therapy when my therapist said to them that she got the feeling I'm bisexual. Which I am, but with their beliefs, that's the last thing they wanted to hear and they deny it to this day. If I go back to therapy, it'll be when I hit college, but I don't know if I can afford that myself. I just feel so confused. Every step forward I think I'm taking, I see I'm just going in a circle. Trapped. I don't know where I should go next. I just want to be sure of myself. I want a reduction surgery for sure so I can at least look more neutral. That I do know. But from there, I don't know where else to go.

I'd suggest to definitely go back into therapy when you can fund it yourself... it took me 3 tries to find a good therapist who has worked out for me. I really think you should speak to another one before making any final decisions - and keep your parents out of it.

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[quote name=Selita Jo ^_^' timestamp='1315772908' post='233709]

I'd suggest to definitely go back into therapy when you can fund it yourself... it took me 3 tries to find a good therapist who has worked out for me. I really think you should speak to another one before making any final decisions - and keep your parents out of it.

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I'm actually kinda scared to go back to therapy. I'd rather talk to people who are in similar situations and learn from them, then go to therapy if I have to that way it won't have to last as long. I've been delving into the "category" of androgyny and that actually makes me feel much more comfortable than the idea of transition did. But still..this is still a process.

What won't - the therapy? The longer it lasts the better... I've been in mine for almost a year now and I still won't jump the gun in finishing because of my recent move into house-sharing again. I'd hate to leave and then for something monumental to happen and I have nowhere to go and talk about it. Good, decent therapy is meant to take time - if you rush it you won't get the results you need. I do understand what you're saying and of course it's scary but it's one of those things you just have to step up to - and you'll probably still find you're scared to go every single time but I found it always works out a great session if I run into it and don't shy away.

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[quote name=Selita Jo ^_^' timestamp='1315773387' post='233728]

What won't - the therapy? The longer it lasts the better... I've been in mine for almost a year now and I still won't jump the gun in finishing because of my recent move into house-sharing again. I'd hate to leave and then for something monumental to happen and I have nowhere to go and talk about it. Good, decent therapy is meant to take time - if you rush it you won't get the results you need. I do understand what you're saying and of course it's scary but it's one of those things you just have to step up to - and you'll probably still find you're scared to go every single time but I found it always works out a great session if I run into it and don't shy away.

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That's what I was hoping. I just don't have the patience nor courage to try out different therapists to see which one is better for me and what I'm dealing with. I don't like talking as much as it is. I internalize like second nature. I get your point, facing the problem is always better than backing away. But with therapy? I just can't. After what's happened before, I can't.

Forgive me for using a really old cliche, but there's no such thing as can't. With something this monumental you have to be strong. I was in a terrible place, practically a hermit, so from that can you imagine how hard it was for me to get out and go to speak to a stranger and tell her my deepest, darkest shit? And today I'm off anti-depressants and I understand myself a lot better. I'm not fixed by a long shot, but I'm a long way from where I was. I'm not trying to be cruel to you, I'm trying to exercise a tough love and the only way I can do that is by drawing on my own experience.

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[quote name=Selita Jo ^_^' timestamp='1315774208' post='233752]

Forgive me for using a really old cliche, but there's no such thing as can't. With something this monumental you have to be strong. I was in a terrible place, practically a hermit, so from that can you imagine how hard it was for me to get out and go to speak to a stranger and tell her my deepest, darkest shit? And today I'm off anti-depressants and I understand myself a lot better. I'm not fixed by a long shot, but I'm a long way from where I was. I'm not trying to be cruel to you, I'm trying to exercise a tough love and the only way I can do that is by drawing on my own experience.

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I understand. But also, forgive me for saying this, but different strokes for different folks. Therapy was not for me then and it isn't now. I will make you this promise, if there is indeed no other way, I will go. But at this time, there is nothing to bring me into that way again. I appreciate the care and the tough love. It's something I haven't seen in a good 6 years. I don't find you to be cruel at all. But I was against seeking therapy from the start because I have found many therapists to be cut from alot of the same mold. Especially over here. My mind may change the more I think, but where I stand now, I will not go.

Come over here and visit my therapist :lol:

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Good luck with whatever your decision is. If you decide to do it, just make sure you're thinking about the long run, not just thinking about life right now. Don't want you to have any regrets years down the road.

I wanted to say this to you yesterday but I didn't want to come off cold hearted, but it's long overdue for you to get over that. Just because he managed to be in a relationship with someone else doesn't mean he could have made it work with you. And you don't have to "outdo" him, because in all honesty you will end up looking like a fool since it's clear he doesn't care about you or what you do.

why would I look like a fool? If I can look at my life and say to myself, you did great, that means I see the value in myself, and by that point I won't care what my ex did/does, out doing him in my mind looks like he lost on a good thing.

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why would I look like a fool? If I can look at my life and say to myself, you did great, that means I see the value in myself, and by that point I won't care what my ex did/does, out doing him in my mind looks like he lost on a good thing.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to outdo someone (mainly when it comes to your career), but to want to do better than an ex means they still have control over you. Regardless if it makes you happy or not, you'd constantly be checking on him to see where he's at in his life, when you shouldn't be thinking about them at all.
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